You know, in our life it is so easy to confuse means and ends. The point of their life was to fish. But I suspect that a bit like people today, they got all involved in the nets -- netted, if you like, in their own nets. I would have liked to have a word with Mrs. Zebedee. I think she would have had a thing or two to say about those damned nets. If he isn't mending them, he's breaking them; if he isn't breaking them, he's washing them; and if he isn't washing them, he is breaking many of them all over again. Means have become ends, you see. He was living to fish rather than fishing to live. I think that on the side of the boats there was a notice, of course in gothic gold-lettering as we so often put outside of churches, "Zebedee and Sons, Ltd." I like to think somebody had written underneath, "very limited." Zebedee and Sons, Ltd., washing their nets.

Jesus does his teaching from the boat. Then when He is finished talking to the crowd -- everybody -- He turned and talked to somebody. God has a word for all of us, individually and personally, as well as corporately. Jesus turned and looked at Peter and He said to Peter, "Put out into the deep, and let down your nets for a catch." Put out into the deep.

Real life in a sense only begins when we are out of our depth. I can say that from the heart because I can't swim. I've never been able to live out of my depths. You see, I want to be a person who wants to be Mr. Fixit. I want to control everything. The thing I have had to learn in my life as a Christian disciple -- and it has been the most painful lesson, I think -- is to rest and to trust. I can't do it yet with swimming. You see, you can't be a theoretical swimmer; you can be a bad swimmer. You can't be a theoretical Christian; you can be a bad Christian.

"Let down your nets for a catch. Put out into the deep, Simon." Life begins when we are out of our depth, when we are out of control, and we hand over the management of our life to Someone whom we can truly trust. You can see Peter's face at that moment. "It is all right for you, Jesus, to talk about religious things, but don't start interfering with my work. It is all right for my faith to have something to say about my Sunday life, but don't let the Christian faith begin to influence the way I run the rest of my life, Monday to Friday." Peter did not look very pleased. "Put out into the deep, and let down your nets for a catch." Simon answers Jesus, "Master, we've toiled all night and took nothing but your word. I'll let down the nets, nevertheless, at your word."

Peter is on the brink of a real change in his life. He is going to move from doing everything at his own whim to beginning to live his life according to God's word. He is going to learn to take God at His word. God is as good as His word. This is the moment of risk for Peter. He lets down the nets and as we know from the story, when they had done this, they enclosed a great shoal of fish. As their nets were breaking, they beckoned to their partners in the other boat to come and help them. You know, the shortest text in the New Testament is "Jesus wept." I like to think there is another text that should go in the New Testament, "Jesus laughed." I think at that point Jesus rolled back and roared with laughter at Peter. Peter thought, "What can I do? The nets are breaking." So, he beckons down to his partners, his rivals further down the coast, and asks if they will come over and help him. As he does that, he falls to his knees and in the words recorded by Luke it says, "Depart from me, Lord; for I am a sinful man. Depart from me, Oh Lord; for I am a sinful man." Why ever did Peter say at that point, "Depart from me; for I am a sinful man, O Lord?" It is a good question.

Sin, you know, means missing the point of it all. It is an archery analogy. It means drawing an arrow and shooting at a target and missing the point of the target and falling short. I think in that moment Peter had a vision almost. He suddenly saw that the whole of his life had missed the point of it all. He was a man going nowhere. I love that Beatles' song, "I'm just a nowhere man, living in a nowhere land, making lots of nowhere plans for nobody. Doesn't have a point of view, knows not where he's going to. Isn't he a bit like you and me?"

Yes, Peter was a nowhere man up to that point. He was netted in his nets, means had become ends. He had lost his way, but in that moment of break down, God broke through. It is often in the moment of break down in our lives when God does break through. When we are finished, He can make a new beginning. And that is what is going to happen to Peter on this amazing day when he encounters Jesus and when he learns to trust Him, to throw his lot in with Him.

Luke says, as a matter of fact, "He was astonished and all that were with Him." I like that word "astonished." Often when God is doing something for us, we are astonished because God is the God of surprises. Jesus then turns to Peter and says those marvelous words, "Do not be afraid; henceforth, Peter, you will be catching men."

"Do not be afraid."

The New Testament scholars tell us that the phrase, "Do not be afraid," occurs 365 times in the bible. I don't know if that is absolutely true, but I like to think it is because, you see, it means we have all got a text everyday from the minute we get out of bed. To begin every new day, we need to hear those words, "Do not be afraid." In the place of fear, put faith and trust in order that we can risk living a brave new life in a brave new world.

Three hundred and sixty-five times, "Do not be afraid." The only trouble with that is, I suppose, if it only occurs 365 times and if you are a literalist, you wouldn't get out of bed on February 29 in a leap year because there wouldn't be a text. I suppose that is not a bad definition of a fundamentalist, but the word is the important thing, "Do not be afraid." That is what God came to say to us in Jesus Christ. He came to say to everyone of us, "Trust me. Learn to trust." Trust opens, you see, a whole new world of possibilities, a brave new world for brave new men and women.

Jesus said to Simon, "Do not be afraid; henceforth, you will be catching men." When they brought their boats to land, they left everything and followed Him. We began with a picture, didn't we? The picture of those boats and those damned nets (if you will forgive the phrase, according to Mrs. Zebedee) and Peter mending them cautiously. We end the picture not with that phrase, "Zebedee and Sons, Ltd.," but with Jesus' last words to Peter, "Follow me." I like to think that as Jesus and James and John and Peter walked together into the sunrise somebody came along and just kicked over the sign "Zebedee and Sons, Ltd." Then as I bend down and look in the sand, I think I can see they have written these words, "Under new management."

That's it. That is what real life is. When I put my life under new management, like the recovering alcoholic, I think I've discovered that my life is no longer manageable on my terms. I need to be out of control and hand the control of my life in its every-day detail into the hands of another. That, my friends, is the secret of new life. It is the secret of beginning a new life, a brave new life, in a brave new world for brave new men and women. Yes, trust changes everything. That was the lesson Peter had to learn before he could possibly set out on those amazing adventures that God had prepared for him, and it is the most important lesson of our lives -- to learn to trust. Trust transforms everything.

There is a lovely pulpit story I would like to finish with. It is told of a little boy playing on top of a cliff. It was a very high cliff, and the sea was lapping the side of the cliff many feet below. Nearby were three men who were professional bird egg collectors. The professional bird egg collectors were a little bit middle-aged, rather like myself, and were not too nimble of foot. There was a particular nest of rare birds eggs just over the edge of the cliff where these middle-aged men couldn't get. They asked the little boy if he would be willing to be lowered on a rope just over the edge of the cliff to get two of the eggs of these rare birds. As they asked the little boy if he was willing to do it, the little boy looked into their faces. He looked at the cliff; he looked at the sea a long way below. Then he replied in these simple words, "Okay, as long as daddy holds the rope."

I think that is when new life really begins, when we realize that the God who created us is a God who can take care of us -- "as long as Daddy holds the rope" -- our Father in heaven. When we learn to trust Him and take Him at his word, then life takes on a new meaning, a new significance and a new direction. Trust changes everything.

Teach me, Lord, to cast all my cares upon You, because I know that you truly care for me. Amen.

Talbot: Bishop Marshall, you bring into your ministry a stunning mix of talent and achievement. You are an acclaimed concert pianist along with all the rest that you do. What is that state of rapture we could call it that exists when one combines the spiritual life and creative spirit?

Marshall: I think it is the ability to transcend yourself, to get out of yourself. I think the phrase "get lost" is not only an insult, but it is a blessing. Get lost, lose yourself. Music and art and poetry and religion, supremely enable us to transcend ourselves. There is that lovely phrase, "A man the marvel seeing, forgets his selfish being, for the joy of a beauty which is not his own."

Talbot: For you which came first, the music or the ministry?

Marshall: Chronologically, the music did, because I have played the piano since a little boy of three. My mother was a very good pianist; my father was a violinist, and so there was always music in our home. My first encounter with life, if you like, was a very musical one. Then later, faith became interwoven with music. In the end, of course, I'm afraid it is the Christian faith that has won.

Talbot: And where does suffering fit into all of that?

Marshall: Suffering and creativity, this was a lesson I had to learn before I could really come to faith. I would put suffering and creativity at two opposite ends, you see. I thought that God, the Creator, was above all the suffering and darkness in the world. It wasn't until I really stumbled across the great composers and then, supremely, Christ on Calvary, that I found that creativity and suffering and love all belong together in the same bundle and that God is at the heart of it.

Talbot: Talk a minute about some of those great composers and what lessons we have to learn as people of faith.

Marshall: There is the extraordinary paradox of Beethoven. If you read his letter to his brother about his deafness, it is an incredible letter. To think this man who could hear music so supremely as he could and yet was deaf. Then, of course, there is Chopin dying of TB. There is Mozart, a tragic early death. There is Schubert who died of syphilis at a very early age, etc. I mean there is more suffering per square inch among creative people than there is among the general run of the mill. There is a mystery there.

Talbot: And your own suffering you alluded to earlier in the sermon. How is it that God was able to break in at your moment of breakdown?

Marshall: I don't know. That is a gift God has given me, you see, that's a great mystery, but there is no doubt about it that God touched my life and in that moment of touching, it was through suffering. There is a marvelous phrase in the book of Job, "Have pity on me, oh, my friends. The hand of God has touched me." I think in this world whenever the hand of God touches you, it always bruises you in some way.

Talbot: You refer to alcoholism and it is a daily, daily discipline.

Marshall: It's a daily surrender, isn't it?

Talbot: Surrender.

Marshall: That's right. A marvelous first step is the first step of Christian discipleship. The first step of alcoholism, "I acknowledge that I am powerless, but in my powerlessness God has given me strength."

Talbot: And so, in letting go like Peter, letting the net go, the nowhere man whose life had been pointless was able to let go.

Marshall: To let go and to let God.

Talbot: You told me before the program that you lead a double life. Now, tell us more about that.

Marshall: That was supposed to intrigue you, Lydia.

Talbot: It did.

Marshall: Yes, I think I do have a kind of double grip on my life, as it were. There is the grip that God has got hold of me and there is no doubt about that in my life. I am grateful some days for that and at other times I slightly resent it, but also music is very, very important to me indeed. They say, incidentally, that the two go together, you know, in the history of the church. There is no renewal of Christianity which is not expressed through renewal in music.

Talbot: When you return to England, you are going to return to a new Steinway in your home.

Marshall: I am. That's right. I told you that.

Talbot: And you do perform, but tell us a little bit more about what else you will return to in your role as Director of Evangelism for the Archbishop of Canterbury.

Marshall: I'm afraid I return to a lot of travel. There is no escaping of that. I mean it is significant that the Apostle Paul was on the road a great deal. He often tells us about his accidents on the road.

Talbot: But what does evangelism mean in England?

Marshall: Evangelism simply means sharing the Good News, telling people that in the end it is all right.

Talbot: Is that a different kind of religious sensibility that you experience in your home land than we do here in the United States?

Marshall: Yes. Americans, forgive me, are much more extrovert about everything and they are more extrovert about their religion, but I don't put them down for that. The English are far too inhibited about many things. We are inhibited about our religion as well and that is not a good thing. We have to learn to gossip the gospel. We have got to learn to share our faith with others.

Talbot: Inhibited about your religion. Yet, in England there is not the dramatic divisions, separation between church-state kinds of issues, that there is in America.

Marshall: No, there isn't and that is one of the paradoxes.

Talbot: There is a different comfort level.

Marshall: Yes, there is. I think that is true but, of course, still the polite Englishman is told there are three things that are taboo. You must not mention at table sex, politics or religion. I think, frankly, they are the only things worth talking about.

Talbot: As the Catholic theologian David Tracy says, "Religion so often is secularized and placed in a sacred reservation of the spirit" over there.

Marshall: It needs to invade the whole of our life, as we saw in the Peter passage. You see, Peter was very, very glad to have Jesus talk about religious things. What made him very disturbed was when Jesus began to say, "Now what about your business life, Peter? What about your private life?"

Talbot: How does that fit with one of the most historic moves in the Anglican Church in 1992, and that is the ordination of women? How is that whole issue being received and reacted to?

Marshall: It has been a very divisive issue as it still is in this country because it touches on some very, very raw nerves, doesn't it? Once you begin to talk about gender and sexuality and the relationship of men to women, you are talking about some very, very sensitive things. I think this has put its finger on a very sensitive area but, nevertheless, I am proud to belong to a church that is prepared to discuss it and bring it out into the open.

Talbot: And the healing? Where is the healing?

Marshall: The healing that would go with it. I pray for healing in a relationship between the sexes actually. I think there needs to be great reconciliation between men and women, between black and white, between male and female. I think Christianity points us to that.