When she didn't have anything more to sell, she cried out to Elijah and said that she had nothing in the house. He suggested to her that she might have forgotten something. She thought a little bit and said that she had a little pot of oil. While it did not seem significant at all, Elijah reminded her that even something insignificant in the hands of God is something that He can use to our good. He told her to collect a whole lot of vessels, knock on neighbors' doors, bring them into the house, and take the little pot of oil and pour it out.

As she did that, a miracle happened. The oil kept flowing and all of the vessels were filled. She ran and told Elijah. He said that she had better go, sell the oil, and live off the proceeds.

I want to talk about this little lady because I have a feeling that many of you can relate to her. First of all, she ran out. She said, "I have nothing in the house."

I know that is where some of you are. You have nothing in the house; you have nothing in your life. You feel you have run out. Perhaps like this lady, you are bereaved. That will do it. There is nothing that makes us feel so empty, useless, that we have nothing in the house, nothing left to give, nothing left to cope with, than bereavement. Perhaps you have lost a husband; perhaps your marriage has died; perhaps a child has died; perhaps a relationship has died. You have run out.

She was also bankrupt. In fact, she was going to have to sell her children into slavery. That might sound terribly bizarre, but in the day in which she lived, children could be taken into a godly home and given a trade to learn. Seven years afterwards, in the year of Jubilee, they would be returned to care for the widow, so it is not quite as bad as it sounds. However, if you had to sell your children into slavery, I am sure you would say, "Well, that doesn't feel so good." She was bankrupt; she had nothing in the house; she had nothing left to pay the bills. The creditor was coming to take away her children. To lose your husband is one thing, but to lose your children is another.

I have stood with single parents in the courts in Milwaukee, a city where we minister in a church. I have watched them lose their children in a battle. Perhaps the husband has gone off with someone else, and he is fighting her for the children. She does not have money with which to fight the case. In the end, she will even have to pay the lawyer's bills.

This little lady, too, would have to have paid the creditors for the privilege of taking her children away. You think the Bible is not relevant?

Have you run out? Are you in the same hot agony as this woman? What did she do after she had run out? She cried out, which was a very wise thing to do. She cried out to the right person. She had an Elijah in her life. It is a wonderful thing when you are in trouble to have somebody who really knows God and can help you. She went to a man she knew who was strong in his commitment, was strong knowing the word of God, and was strong in prayer. She said to him, "I'm in trouble. I have nothing in the house."

He said something very, very encouraging to her. He said, "Oh, yes, you have."

Then they began this little argument. "Oh, no I haven't"

"Oh, yes, you have."

"Oh, no, I haven't."

"Oh, yes, you have."

In her extremity, she had forgotten that she had a little pot of oil.

It reminds me that we belong to God. Even those of us who are believers, who are Christians and who profess the Christian faith, who know Christ as our Savior, who profess that, in extremity forget the little pot of oil.

Oil is a symbol of the Holy Spirit. Oil is a symbol of the presence of God in our lives. Often in trouble, when we have run out, we cry out to God and say, "I've nothing in the house."

He reminds us, "Oh, yes, you have. You have my presence. You have the little pot of oil."

As I have told you, Elijah suggested that she collect the vessels. She told her little boys to run around the neighborhood, get all the big jars and bring them into the house. Elijah told her to shut the door and pour out.

As I have looked at the scriptural story, I have often wondered why he told her to shut the door. I have a feeling that Elijah wanted her to prove God for herself. Perhaps if the mighty Elijah had been there, she would have trusted him instead of trusting God.

Sometimes we do turn to other people. The first time crisis comes, we pick up the phone. We run to the counsellor; we knock on the door of the pastor instead of knocking on the door of heaven; instead of shutting the door and saying, "God, if You are as big as You say You are in the Scriptures, if You are as great as You leaned out of heaven to tell us, then you help me in my extremity."

I can still see her standing in front of the boys with that little pot of oil in her hand, not daring to tip it upside down. What would happen if she did and nothing came out? What would have happened to the boys' faith? They would think that there wasn't a God after all; that mom trusted in God and nothing happened.

You know what happened according to the scriptures. She did dare by faith to pour out that little pot of oil. It seemed so ridiculous, so stupid. As she did it, the oil flowed and flowed and flowed, and the jars filled and filled and filled, and there was enough. She didn't have to sell the children. God provided enough for her to cope.

I want to illustrate this by a personal story. A long, long time ago I was in missions. I was working with my husband in England with street kids. He travelled and was on the road a lot. Quite frankly, I ran out. I ran out of the ability to go on being mom and dad. I ran out of the ability to cope without feeling so desperately sorry for myself. I couldn't even function. I ran out of the ability to discipline the children. I ran out of peace. I ran out of joy. I ran out.

Fortunately, I had somebody in my life who was an Elijah. I went to the right person, someone I knew who would be tough on me and yet tender with me. She was.

I said, "I've run out. I'm bankrupt. I am bereft. I feel bereaved; I feel like a grass widow. My husband is never at home to help me with the children and they are driving me crazy. I have run out of the ability to cope."

She said, "No, you haven't. You've got the little pot of oil."

She arranged for me to get a baby sitter and set me free to go out that night to do what I love to do best, to get out among young people who have never set foot in a church. I could take you to the door where I stood that night absolutely bereft, absolutely empty saying, "This is ridiculous. I've nothing to give."

It was raining because it was England, and in England they say there are two seasons, winter and the second week of August. It was still raining and it was the second week of August. I stood in that doorway feeling so miserable, feeling I had nothing to give. In faith, I stepped out and began to pour out into the lives of those young people.

I took a little girl home with me that night who was on the run. She was a pastor's kid. She wanted to get away from religion and her father and mother, who wanted her to go to church, so she had run away from home. I led her to Christ and I poured out into her life.

Then I found some other empty vessels and I poured out into their lives. I want to tell you something. The oil never stopped flowing. It was wonderful. One kid here; one kid there. Soon I had a whole mass of kids. A farmer gave me a barn and put the cows out into the pasture. We turned it into a youth group.

Then we prayed for a bus. You say that you can't pray for buses. We did because we didn't have money to buy one. God gave us a bus. Yes, He did. After we got the bus and the barn, the kids began to walk eight miles through the winter, just these leather-jacketed, hair-all-over-the-place kids, empty kids, kids who had run out. Yet, Jesus had met them and now they were full -- full of power, full of joy and full of purpose in life.

They began to pour out into other people's lives. We began to get youth programs going among the unchurched kids in the neighborhood. It was wonderful.

You know what happened in the end? We bought a great big warehouse and God filled it with four stories full of kids. There were kids in my heart; kids in my head; kids coming out my ears. It was wonderful. I had thought I had run out but, God, whose name is sufficiency, proved otherwise.

I have a locket around my neck. On the back of it, there is a verse, "Bring ye all the tithes into the warehouse and prove me now, says the Lord. I am going to open the windows of heaven and pour you out a blessing and there is not going to be room to receive it."

Do you know where I got this locket? From a kid who had just come out of jail and was roaming the streets. I, who thought I had run out, took the little pot of oil and poured God into his life. He became a leader, a leader of his peers, a leader for other people, with a message that made sense.

My question to you is, "Are you like this little widow? Did you run out? Will you cry out?"

If you do, you can begin to pour out and as you pour out, God will pour in. That is the principle of the Christian life. Don't wait for Him to pour in before you pour out. Pour out of your bankruptcy; pour out of your emptiness in faith. As you give yourself to others, that is the therapy the hurting heart needs, the lonely heart looks for. That is the therapy. As He pours into your life, you will pour out into the life of others. You will see all the empty vessels of your neighbors, all your friends, all your family, all hurting hearts will be filled with God.

David Hardin: When we were talking before, you mentioned that you and Stuart have finished your first joint book, Pulling Together While You Are Being Pulled Apart, which sounds like your life and probably a lot of ours.

Jill Briscoe: I think so.

Hardin: What are you trying to say in the book?

Briscoe: I think people in this hectic lifestyle that we have are pulled apart by all sorts of things. We happen to be pulled apart by our work. Other people are pulled apart with duties or all sorts of reasons. How is a marriage going to survive in this day and generation unless you find something to keep you together? That is the essence of it.

Hardin: My wife and I meet with some other couples pretty regularly and we talk about marriage. We are all in agreement that marriage is a very, very difficult assignment. Anyone who says that marriage is easy is either unconscious or is living with a martyr.

Briscoe: I think the whole key to marriage is commitment. If you are in a house and a fire breaks out and there is a fire escape, one of you is going to opt out. If you take the key and lock the fire escape and throw the key out the window, you are both going to fight the fire. That is what commitment is. I think once that is decided, then everything else can be worked out.

Hardin: There are a lot of young people today who are saying that commitment scares them or that it doesn't seem to work well and so they are staying out of it.

Briscoe: They haven't had much modeling in their background. We have raised a damaged generation. Unfortunately, the kids don't have a model. They don't know what a mom and a dad communicating normally is any more. They have nowhere to look.

Hardin: I look at your life and at Stuart's, and all the demands on your time, and the ministries that you both have had together and separately, and then the kids. Did the kids resent the ministry?

Briscoe: No. They never did. It's a question of picking up your attitude. You know kids don't create your attitude. They reveal it, unfortunately. So they just bump up against you and whatever is inside spills out. I think if a mom and a dad are resentful, then that will spill out and the children will pick it up. We always taught our kids that ministry is a privilege not a punishment. That is what the book is about, too.

Hardin: They say that there are no secrets in a family. How you really feel about things is pretty much known by the family, even if it isn't spoken. That is what you are saying. They pick up the mood and the commitment.

Briscoe: Children do. They just take the vibes.

Hardin: Within the church you must have your share of broken marriages and single households. We have churches here now where most of the families consist of a single adult parent. It is going to be hard to raise children in these circumstances, don't you think?

Briscoe: I do, but I still think there is a pattern in the Bible. There are principles there. I think if we can get that foundation of God's principles for family relationships, it will be like building your house on a rock. When the storms come, it won't fall down.

Hardin: One of the things that seems to be happening is that, in a sense, because of divorce, men are taken away from the children. The mother usually keeps them, or they are not married to begin with. So much of that, too. I think the answer to some of that is, as Robert Bly put it in his television program, men need to take on some mentoring of young men especially.

I have a couple of nephews whose father left them pretty early. I spend a lot of time with them because there isn't the balance. A single parent can't provide all the masculine and all the feminine teaching.

Briscoe: You are absolutely right, David. I think the church has its work cut out, because the church is the wider family for the single parent -- or it should be. It should provide that support group and friendship and mentoring. I think the thing is to get into a good church fellowship where they are going to get some help.

Hardin: Is the church still focused too much on the normal family of a married couple, children and not enough on single households.

Briscoe: I don't think that sometimes the church knows what to do. The mess is so incredible and the breakdown is so drastic that it is like putting a finger in the dike. Where do you begin? But we have to begin somewhere. We need premarital classes; we need marriage enrichment and we need to work before them and we need to work afterwards and provide counselling and help.

Hardin: It is just starting to get its feet wet, isn't it?

Briscoe: Right.

Hardin: The church has not quite caught up with the demographics.

Briscoe: That's right.

Hardin: I guess the answer is to look at churches where it is working and you see some dramatic changes in families.

Briscoe: I think we need to showcase good families in the church.